Lord of the Flies

So I'm dogsitting right now, and last night I slept so hard I forgot where I was. I forgot I wasn't in my bed, I forgot there was a small dog in the bed next to me, I forgot that wasn't my pillow that I was humping.

And then in the middle of this sleep, the dog snorted and shifted.

Had I remembered where I was, this tiny innocuous sound would not even have disturbed my slumber. But as it was, I woke up and my heart stopped.

Instantly I thought THERE IS AN ANIMAL IN MY ROOM LARGER THAN A BREADBOX. I seriously--seriously--thought there was a warthog in my room. And that it was going to attack me. I started groping next to my bed for my imaginary spear. I was about to get all Lord of the Flies on my new shuffling friend. Or all "Oklahoma," as it were.

And then the window shades of my mind snapped open. And my invisible hog turned into a white, fluffy dog curled up against the back of my legs. And my heart resumed its beating.

Good thing I couldn't find that spear.