Jamie: I can't believe you tripped and fell, but I know you well enough to know that this isn't a super secret cover up story to hide the fact that one two many glasses of vino prompted a naked mud wresting match with the crazy hot neighbor upstairs - things got out of control.....and the carpet got the best of your chin. That thought wouldn't even enter my mind. Michelle: It looks like a bruise! You should say someone hit you!*
*I think I shall take this one even further and blame it on a mugging. Or perhaps something about saving the life of a baby. Much more sensible than “I tripped.” That’s what abused children say when they show up to school with a black eye: “I ran into the doorknob.” I RAN INTO THE DOORKNOB, PEOPLE.
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